1) "Maybe you're trying too hard?
Stop trying and it will happen...
it worked for me"

Little do these women realize the reason why
it worked for them is because they don't
know then they ovulated, so they just presume
ovulation is this evil thing that can come
any time during your cycle-
or even more hilariously-
during your period.
Here's my theory,
if you have sex long enough
at any time during the cycle,
anytime you want,
and you and your Dh
have no physical problems,
you are bound to conceive
without 'trying"
(Sex+no physical problems= pregnancy)
Any questions? ;-)

2) "Have you considered adoption?
My cousins' sisters' Aunt's mom adopted and
got pregnant immediately,
maybe is can work for you, no?"

Ha! can someone give me one valid scientific proof
that stressing over the costs and time-consuming,
heart-aching expenses of adoption can suddenly make
my ovaries so jealous that they pop out an egg
resulting in immediate pregnancy?

3) "What about invitro-fertilization?
Have you heard of this?"
Have i heard of this? My pocket book and
bank account cringes at the thought
of a minimum of $12,000 per medicated cycle
of IVF.
And when has IVF has suddenly become
the cure-all for all women who take a while,
or require medical intervention to conceive?
Maybe I thought on this one a little too hard.

4) "Oh, fertility drugs?
That means you're gonna have Septuplets
like that one lady on TV right?....how exciting!"
Yeah exciting!
Nothing excites me more than to gain a cute,
curvy 100+lbs all for 7 underweight babies.
I am sure my husband will enjoy my lovely
stretch marks that look like the county
map on my butt.

5) "Are you sure you want that responsibility
for the rest of your life?"

As I get this comment often, i think,
do i want the responsibility of raising
their hare-brained child, or MINE?
Makes me wonder what some of these
women took during pregnancy to result in
such misbehaved children....
On and on, thats for another topic another day...

6) "Taking Charge of Your fertility?
Natural family planning?!
Well no wonder you're not getting pregnant,
that Rhythm Method doesnt work,
didn't grandma tell you that?"
Oh man, don't make me explain why grandma
has 11 children
and why the Rhythm method didnt work...
here comes the lecture on the mythical day 14
ovulation and how we should have sex
days 10-17 and we will be pregnant in NO time.

7) "Have sex everyday, thats bound to get
you pregnant!"
Sex everyday without an egg to fertilize
will for sure get me pregnant!
Why didnt i think of this before...::
shmack shmack::
I am not sure what kind of caffeine
or speed these ladies take,
but all the Jolt in the world couldnt
give me the energy
to make love every night every cycle...

8) "Oh you took depo-provera,
well don't you know it can take up to 3 years
before you can get pregnant after that shot!"
Considering I have had 1 shot 12 months ago,
and I have normal periods
with ovulation on Clomid, I have a feeling
that's not the problem.

 
THE WORLDS MOST LOATHED COMMENTS:

"I got pregnant first try with all 42 of
my children"

some sex tip like "You know your father
and I did it
in the bathtub when we conceived you!"

"wait until you are AT LEAST 1 week late
before testing"
A week, is she mother Theresa!?
I have no patience.

And our favorite…
"So are you pregnant yet?"

Well i guess there is some good from our
infertility experiences...
we are given the sole responsibility to
educate each and every one of our
hillbilly cousins who think that
injectable infertility meds
can be addictive and are also illegal,
that Sperm washing is for people with STD's.
and 2 IUI's can get your
drivers' license taken away! Heaven forbid,
what are we going to do with these people?

~~From the malcontentious mind of Shara

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~