+++ Thanks Momma Kath, I just ordered on Saturday and they were in today's mail. Wow. I was thinking I had another week to wait before they would come. Colleen....
Dear Momma,
About ten months ago I discovered your website.
I used its wisdom and became pregnant with my second son, Theron Isaiah.
He entered this world on June 17, 2004. He was absolutely beautiful.
I just wanted to say thank you for giving women a place
where they can feel like we are among people that know exactly
what we are going through no matter what it is.
This is a blessing.
I am attaching a picture of my new son
so you can see what your advice and God's grace
has allowed me to be a part of.
Thank you,
Holli H
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath
I would like to thank you for getting my
order to me so quickly!
It was here in 2 days. The TTC booklet is absolutely darling.
DH and I read it as soon as we got it.
He liked the fact that there was a little page in there for the men
explaining ways for him to prepare for TTC and stuff.
He was tickled pink.
Thanks again for all your help,
Dinelle
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
I just want to thank you once again!...
I don't know how to thank you..
You were such a blessing...
I just remember the night,
I felt so alone..
when I surfed the net and checked your site...
since that nite...I became a regular visitor of your site...
made friends and shared everything about ttc...
for almost 2 years........
now...
I go back to the Doc on the 5th of nov to check
if I'm dilating...
I'm experiencing pain every night...
and OB told me that I'm in prelabor.. (yikes!!!)
I don't know how I feel...
I feel excited and nervous at the same time..
my DH will file his leave on Nov 1 (my bday) -
nov 6 so, whatever happens... he'll be by my side... :)
i just can't believe it!..
I remember when I bought the
HPT and tested.
The moment I took the test and told my DH that we
were going to have a baby at last!...
After almost 2 years of trying...
With all my heart.. thank you so much!...
God bless you and your loved ones...!!
still nervous,
Aleiea
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I just want to congratulate you for putting up the awsome ttc website.
So many women have gotten pg (including me edd 12/21/02) learning from each
other and exchanging information.
Not to mention having the shoulders and support to weep on when needed.
I'm so glad I found this website!
Once again congratulations and thank you!!!!!
Betsy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thanks!
I just wanted to thank you -
we gave birth to Macy Anne on August 8th.
We started TTC in June and finally succeeded in November
(sometime during our anniversary weekend).
Your boards have helped so much and
there are some wonderful ladies who participate.
Thanks again for all
your hard work!
Beth
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
From : Joy
Subject : Heart and soul.
Wow! Thanks for the speedy delivery of HPTs.
I love your website, and the chat room
is really nice and fast.
I gleaned info that I had not
heard before from your FAQ info-pages.
Thanks for the service you provide for us TTC'ers -
your philosophy and your heart really show!
Love in Him,
Joy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Subject: I am finally pregnant!!
Dear Momma Kath,
I e-mailed you yesterday afternoon regarding a faint pink line
that was registering on my TTC Store HPT.
Thank you for your prompt response!!
I took another test this AM upon waking,
and the line was darker!
I can't believe that I am finally pregnant after 12 months of trying.
I thank you for this wonderful website. By following the suggestions of other women on the success board, I quickly became pregnant after discovering "tryingtoconceive.com" one and a half months ago. You are truly a blessing, and I will be passing along your website to several of my friends who are still trying for a little miracle.
I will be posting my success story so that others can benefit! Thanks for all of the "eggy thoughts" and pregnancy dust!!
Sincerely,
Cheryl G
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi G Momma Kath!
Thanks again for all your hard work and wonderful site.
I thank you personally for helping me get pg.
All of your advice on herbs, etc. have
definitely been a God send.
You are truely a special lady and your turn is soon....
I just know it!
Thanks again......Melissa :)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I love this board!
I just wanted to let you know how helpful this board has been.
I am 4 DPO and hopeful. I had a lot of questions
and found some answers by reading other peoples' experiences.
I had more questions and decided to make my own post.
I had immediate response. This board will help me keep
my sanity until I can test in 10 days.
I also noticed the PG tests are a very good price
- not to mention the other products.
You and Elizabeth are angels.
Thanks Again,
Kim O.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thanks goes to you, Momma Kath, for all your caring advice!!!
Bless you for giving us a forum to find strength in each other!
Marissa
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
New at ttc and found this site while looking for info
have been using the site for about 2 months and I firmly
believe it is the best site with the most info and support.
Thank you.
Nancy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It's my pleasure and honor to be added to your success album and home
page.
You are probably one of the sweetest and most postive people I've ever
come across. I admire your perserverance in your situation and how you
created an
outlet for others in the same situation.
Dana
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dear Momma Kath
Thank you so much for your personal reply, WHAT A
LOVELY SURPRISE! I'm a little new to the internet
and couldn't quite convince myself that the people
on screen actually exist. Forgot to say last time
that the TTC site is great - I've spent hours
trawling anything to do with infertility and nothing
else even comes close. Thanks again for the advice,
I'll keep you posted of any further developments.
As we say this side of the pond, Merry Christmas and
a Happy New Year.
love from
Amanda
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dear MommaKath!
My husband and I just found out that we expecting TWINS!
We are very thrilled and scared and every other emotion in between.
Anyway, just wanted to send you an update because I don't think that
I would have made it this far
if it hadn't been for the support I found here!
Jenjen
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dear Momma Kath,
I just wanted to write and thank you for your
website. My husband and I are living in South Korea
away from all our friends and
family so your site has
been a wonderful blessing as we decided
to start our new family.
Apart from my husband, you are the first to know
that I am pregnant thanks to all the helpful
information and advice at TTC!!
Love and Blessings,
Sheree
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Subject: Thank you!
Momma Kath,
I just wanted to thank you so much for putting
together this site and encouraging all the wonderful support.
I am sure I would not be pg right now
if I hadn't found this site and learned so much about the
whole thing! The support that all the ladies give
has been a lifesaver for me. I am hoping your new doctor can
get you the result you want.
Thank you so much!!
LizP
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Thanks for your answer!
I want to tell you that your site is awsome!
I check the main board every day and enjoy it very much.
I learned so much from the ladies there and from
the info on the FAQs I cannot thank you enough.
My whole attitude towards TTC has changed in the
last three months that I have been visiting your site.
I feel like I wasted a whole year because of
ignorance about what I have to do to get PG.
It's a subject I didn't feel comfortable enough
to speak to anybody about. Mostly because all my friends
succeeded after a very short period of trying, so
nobody had to get more info about it.
This is my 16th cycle of TTC#1 but it's the third
since I am charting according to all the knowledge
I got from the site, so I don't feel there is
any special problem with DH and I, just bad statistics.
I had some blood work done, everything normal.
DH is going for an SA next week and the Dr
prescribed Clomid just to improve our chances.
Here in my country they don't do the whole infertility
workup right away, they let you try with a little help
> of clomid even you ovulate on your own. The good
> news is that the state covers the whole treatment
for up to 2 children, even if you need IVF!
Well, I hope this is not too long. I just wanted to
express my sincere feelings of gratitude.
Bye,
Raquel
Hi Momma Kath,
I was just browsing the gratitude notes
and I saw a note I sent you a few months ago.
I can see the info is out of date because
a lot went on with DH and I from then.
We found out we have severe male factor
and we're heading to our first IVF cycle
in just a few days. These months would have been unbearable
without the help of all the wonderful ladies in this site.
It's so encouraging to see all the success stories and see that cases like ours CAN succeed.
I am also much more comfortable with all the procedures I have to go through when I talk about them with the
ladies who have done them.
It's very comforting to know I have somewhere to go when I have questions.
Thanks again for your site.
It's a blessing.
Love,
Raquel
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi again, I wanted to let you know that I am now pregnant.
I feel so lucky to have found your site
because I believe it is what made the difference.
I learned so much and the support was and is wonderful.
I am now in the alumni DB and
it's great. From your calculator,
my EDD is 10/04
Thanks again for a great site.
CindyC
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Wow! How neat to get a letter from you!
I've been reading your site for a few months now
and I'm just to the point where
many of my friends don't know how to respond
anymore...I update them on my temps, etc. and they
just don't know how to give me any feedback!!
So I'm very thankful to have someplace to go
where no one is telling me to "just relax and
it will happen!!!"
Thanks again for this site and your time.
Julie
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Lisa F
Thank You, Thank You, THANK YOU!!
How could I possibly say enough about this site.
After 11 years of trying to start a family, we were
finally successful after almost two years of
fertility treatments. I don't even want to
try to imagine what
I would have done without each of the wonderful
ladies on this site. I received so much loving
support through all the negative cycles, and the
congratulations were wonderful when I finally saw
that wonderful faint line. I used the TTC store tests, and
they are so very sensitive, the RE couldn't believe
I got a ++ so early!!
This is a loving, supportive and incredibly informative
site, and I'm so glad that it's here for all future TTCers!
The information that is shared so freely is truly amazing.
Congratulations to the women who had the vision for
this site and made it a reality!!!
All my love and support,
Lisa F~
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Thank you very much!
I really wanted you to know that your web site has
really been a great place for me to go where lots of other women know
what I am going through. With the help of your website I have learned
more about TTC than when I was in nursing school!!! You have given me a
great deal of insight and inspiration to hang in there and keep on
trying!!!
Thanks again for all of your hard work and devotion to TTC.
Tracy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thank you for all the informatin you supply.
Just last week I accidentally found out
that I am pregnant. I am now 6 weeks
along on my wedding anniversary of 2 years.
what a present for my husband.
he received his present a little early
but was very excited. Our due date is 6/20/99.
God Bless you and all that are part
of this information web.
Anastasia
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
jenny
Hi, MommaKath. Thanks for the warm welcome. The
information I've obtained since being a part of this
worthwhile program has been invaluable. For a long
time, my dh and I thought we were alone in our sorrows
and frustrations; there seems to be many more people
in this world with similar problems. Because we're
from a very rural place, there isn't any type of
support service here --- medical or psychological.
After years of hoping, we did, however, come into
contact with two drs. who have agreed to take a closer
look at our situation. I've been gathering info. from
the TTC site so that I could discuss various
possibilities with them. With God's grace and the
support of all the TTC members, we hope to one day
share good news on the board.
love and prayers,
jenny
3 m/c -- 3/96, 1/97, & 9/99
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
If it weren't for the wonderful TTC website
I wouldn't have met a fellow TTCer who lives just a
little over a mile away
from me, same town.
We discovered this in the chatroom and met in person
today!
She had an m/c in June @5weeks and I had one in July
@5 weeks too.
I made a new friend and found another to support and
to get support from
during this journey to conceive (and stay pg).
Thanks Momma for this site!
Love and fertility,
Susan S
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi GMomma Kath,
Well, I'm absolutely thrilled to report that I am pregnant!
My EDD is 7/15/00 - WOO HOO!!!
Your website had everything to do with helping me get there,
thank you so much from the bottom of my heart =)
Good luck to you!
{{{HUGS}}}
Jeannie, DH Joseph & our little Pea
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Kath,
First and foremost, I cannot begin to thank YOU
and YOUR website enough!!! I thank the encouragment,
when I wanted to give up, I thank the laughter that
kept me going, when all I wanted to do was quit.
I shared tears with all the happy pregnant news,
and I shed the tears with the not so good news...
I have learned more than I could ever have learned from
any book or Dr. I truly believe that if it was not for
you and your website..it would of taken me longer, and
I by far would NOT know even a morsel of the
information I do know now about my body.
I am crying as I write this, because, I have grown so
much through TTC and your website. I will forever be
indebted to you and the wonderful group of women this
site attracts.
So much love,
Denise
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Hi, I just want to thank you for having these hpt's
available at a reasonable price.
I just ordered 2 more of them....i test like crazy.
I guess i get excited. Husband and I tested yesterday
again twice and both came out possitive.
Your website has been a great help and
we both want to say thank you so much.
Valarie W
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I just wanted to let you know
that I love your website,
I visit it everyday.
I am TTC my second child.
It took us 6 years
to conceive our first child,
after trying IVF, we were told
that we were not going to be
able to have kids,
because the outer layer of my
eggs were too thick to pentrate.
A year after trying IVF and no drugs
we conceived on our own.
Now it has been two years TTC our
second child and still no luck.
Your website is fantastic!!!!!
It gives me insite to things I would of
never thought of trying,
without using the
normal fertility drugs.
Thank you!
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Subj: Thank you thank you
This is a great website!
I also want to thank you for making good hpt's available so cheaply.
I bought three from you this month and tested at 9 dpo (-),
12 dpo (-), and 14 dpo (AFNW, faintly, faintly +).
I went and got a blood test just hours after getting
this shadow of a line (honestly I would NEVER have shown it to DH,
it would have held NO validity to him)
and that test revealed an HCG level of 13.9!!
My test this morning (17 dpo) was 89,
so I know not only that I am finally pg after
8 cycles of trying, but also that it is most
likely NOT another tubal pg. Knowing that a
line is a line is a line, and that the line
that developed over the period of 20 minutes COUNTED,
helped me rule out the ectopic pregnancy as soon as possible.
So here I am at 17 dpo and FLYING with joy.
Thanks
Alaska H
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi!
Your website has been a Godsend
and has helped me greatly during
many nights of obsessing and ruminating about TTC.
My DH sends his good thoughts for giving me
a place to go with all of my TTC frenetic energy!!
I wrote in last week inquiring about a very,
very faint (barely legible) positive pg. test.
I thought I might be seeing things
so I went in to get a blood test
(just as the clinic was closing)
so of course I had to wait over night for the results.
I logged on the TTC web site and got a
great deal of encouragement and a lot of
positive energy plus a sprinkling of pg.
dust for good measure. After a very restless night
(as luck would have it) when I called the clinic the next morning....
The lab tech was logging on the computer
to get my results and the computer was frozen!
Ahhggg!!!! After an interminable wait
(actually only about 2 minutes)
I was told my blood test came back positive.
I was stunned and asked for an explanation.....
(I needed to hear the word "pregnant')
I guess to be certain.
I want to congratulate the founders of the TTC website.
It has helped me immeasurably.
I also purchased a supply of ovulation
and pregnancy tests, which were very economical!
Thank you again.
Annie J. (It looks like I'll be due in late Feb.......)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Everything (OPKs & HPTs) arrived.
Thank you so much. I love your site.
My husband and I are hoping that February is our lucky month.
Thanks again.
Heather
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I received my HPT today only 3 days after ordering them.
Thank you so much for offering at not only
an extremely affordable price,
but delivering them so promptly!
I love the web site and all the support you offer.
Ange
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I want to thank you again for doing the TTC site.
You have done such a wonderful job.
A lot of us rely on it to know that
there is someone else out there going through
what we are and can understand the emotions
that go along with it.
Thanks again~
Carolyn
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
lydia
Subject: Thanks for this great site
I would just like to say thank you
for this great site, it's just good to
know I'm not alone and that there are
people willing to listen.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I love this site.
I am incredibly impressed that after I emailed a question
to Momma Kath about vitex I received an email back promptly.
I look forward to ordering off this site as I would rather
spend my money here than at a faceless store.
Thank you.
Cori
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi!
I have to say, so far, your website is the best for
conceiving information and support.
We're still TTC so thanks for the
fertile thoughts!
Thanks,
Sandra
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Love the site!
It has made my entire outlook on this whole ttc
experience a little bit better!
It helps to have other women with the same
or similar problems to share with!
+++++++++++++++++thoughts!!
DianaNY
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thank you for answering.
I'm very keen to talk to other women who have had
recurring losses and have
no answers or treatment.
I live in London UK.
Its good to know there are great sites like yours.
Denise TTC for 3 years
4 angels in heaven.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
My name is Lisa and I live in CA
with my DH and our 2 yr old son.
I was looking for miscarriage info and as a natural progression,
for ttc web sites. Most of the sites were for women
already pregnant.
Thanks for having a site for us wanna-bes.
Lisa
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi, Ms Kath!
I want to thank you for posting this website. I have
a Doctorate degree in Pharmacy and my husband
is a physician, but nothing could have prepared us
for the emotional and intense journey that TTC has
been. Your website is a godsend and
I will aggressively recommend it to
others who are also TTC.
Best of all to you,
Rebecca
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Subject: Hi Momma Kath....
Firstly, I'd like to thank you for creating this
site, I've come a long way since my first e-mail to you and Elizabeth.
I'm now much more informed about basic infertility,
and specifically my own infertility. I'm now 8dpIUi,
and hoping for the best; and a lot of it is thanks to
you and you site.
I wish you all the bast, and I now you will be
repaid for you labor of love
very soon, with your own Baby!
You and all the ladies are in prayers always.
Thanks again,
Eviek
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi MommaKath~
First things first, this is the most amazing board I
have ever posted on. You deserve many kudos for developing
such a great site. I read a post on the TTC board
that they had renewed faith in humanity (esp.
women) from reading your boards and I agree!
It is extraordinary the amount of support and
positive feedback that everyone gives each other.
So, again, thank you.
Second, I am recently PG.
(One of the many Valentine's Day +)
I'm hoping you'll be joining the Alumnae Board as well.
Thanks!
Nicole
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
dear momma,
i just wanted to thank you for such a great website.
we are onto our third cycle of trying and i was starting
to feel discouraged until i found you.
i am now attacking conception with a renewed vigour!!!!
thanks again, i will keep you posted.
mellissa from australia.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thank you so much
Momma Kath,
Thank you for noticing and putting my
name on the pregnancy ticker. I
feel like now I'm really pregnant.
Without you and this site, I think
I'd be crazy.
You are definitely to be commended.
Love,
Megan
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thank you for taking the time to write me.
I have enjoyed your site...and learned much.
I am grateful for such info...
May god Bless you and your family,
Kym :)
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Just wanted to tell you,
I used my TTC Store home pregnancy tests
this weekend, and I AM PREGNANT!!!
Your site is wonderful!
Kerin
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thanks Momma Kath!
I want to thank you for how helpful your site is for us.
We are lucky to have it.
Shea Nicole
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Thanks for writing back. I just want you to know
that your site IS SUCH A WONDERFUL PLACE!
We all love it and are so grateful to have it.
I just want to say THANK YOU for creating
such a wonderful place. I hope to
be a part of the site for
as long as it's around...through my pregnancy,
through ttc #2, (and hopefully more)
baby talk board, etc..
I've already made some great friends and hope
to continue to make more.
You are the best!
Love,
Renee
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Thanks for a great site.
Momma Kath,
I've never been to a web site that exudes such warmth,
love, compassion (and humor!)
while imparting useful information.
I know it's hard work --
thank you for sharing it with everyone.
Rita
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
It took us almost a year!
After being on the pill for 10 years,
I had my concerns.
But, after a year of morning temps,
charting, herbal remedies and people saying
"we should just do it every day of the month,"
and " you're trying to hard,
relax and it will happen,"
we finally did it!
Your Website gave DH and I a lot of hope.
He enjoyed reading the information
I printed off for him.
Thank you for your wealth of information.
Martina & Duane
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I just want to tell you that your web-site has given me hope.
I've been
trying to conceive for about two years now,
and my HMO has just ok'd for tests and stuff to be run.
I am scared that I will never have children
because I have had a miscarriage.
I was afraid to try again, and now it
seems it will never happen.
After I visited your site, tho,
whenever I get depressed,
or discouraged,
I go there.
Thank You
Windy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi:
Just wanted to say I think you have an awesome site here.
I have been ttc since October 1998.
M/C twice in 1999 and have been actively trying again
since March 2000 with no luck so far.
Last month when my AF came I nearly had a complete breakdown
and decided that I had enough and was ready to just quit.
Then, I came across your website and after reading through
all the info and so many of the success stories
I have a new sense of hope about my situation.
I will continue ttc and have added this site to my favorites.
Maybe one of these days join in the chats.
For now I have just been reading.
Its really just a terrific place and
has given me so much encouragement and information.
Thanks,
Kathy H.
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi Momma Kath:-),
I am so glad that I found this site.
It is really great!
And all the members are so nice and interact w/each other.
It really makes this easier for me since
I came all the way from Macedonia and have no friends or family
that I can talk to or ask questions when I need some answers!
I was using fertilityfriend.com before,
it was Ok but the thing is you can only use that for 30 days
for free and after that you have to subscribe
what makes it hard cause this TTC Journey
is already way to expensive!
When you want something so much it is very hard
when you don't have much control on that,
but it really makes it easyer when you talk to somebody who
is going or had gone through the same thing!
I am so glad about this site and keep up the good work!
Love,
Caci
26yo, TTC#1, cd13 cy4 on clomid 50mg
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
I was referred to your site by a friend! It is
absolutely AWESOME!
Never have I found so much info all in ONE place.
I have been a member of so many online message boards,
and PCOS support groups that I couldnt begin
to tell you all the names of them...
and in each one something just didnt
seem right...either it wasnt for me,
the focus wasn't to better health & TTC..
or I didnt trust the people.
Even though I just joined your message
board and little family on the net...
I have looked around a bit for a
while to see if it was for me...
and I think I have found someplace that
is just right!
God Bless you for making an awesome
connection on the WWW!!!
I look forword to being involved and to lots of
learning!
Love & Many Prayers
Jamiepoo
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Looks like I'm pg.!!!!!!!
I want you to know I owe a large part of it to
your site!
If it hadn't been for you site i would have never bought
TCOYF! I haven't O'ed in 6 months. This was my 2nd round of clomid and
I thought I still hadn't o'ed. I had totally written the month off. BUT
I did have EWCM on the day it turns out I o'ed and we dtd. That was the
only day I had it and because I was so discouraged about not o'ing yet
again, we didn't have many bd'ing nights. I didn't realize until almost
4 days after I o'ed that I had. (I had a stair step rise that wasn't real
clear at first) Because of this site and that book, I actually DTD on the
right day AND WE DID IT!!!!! It's truelly a miracle that after 9 months
of trying and 6 of those being anovulatory that I am actually pg. and
you were a part of that miracle!!!!
I will be posting complete details of my success story tomorrow!
LOVE
Crista
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
Thank you for the prompt delivery and great product
of Aimstick HPT's.
Tested the day they came, in the evening; positive.
Tested again the next morning; positive.
I am on day 28, 11 DPO.
No symptoms yet.
Just swollen chest, maybe from Clomid.
No symptoms with last 2 mc's.
Hoping for a good OB appt.
Thanks for all you do. It is truly a ministry!
Marcia
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Hi Momma Kath:
I received the tests on Friday, and tested on Saturday.....
I got a faint ++++++++!!!!
I can't believe it!!!!
Thank you so much.
Your web site is awesome.
I'm so glad that I found it,
it helped me more than words can say.
God Bless You,
Lisa
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Momma Kath,
I read this story and it made me think of you,
for all that you have done to bring
all of us women together in the ttc journey.
I hope you know how many lives you have touched and enrich everyday.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart! xoxo
Michele
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Mothers Day: My Journey to My Children
It was April and the Minister was new in town. I stopped by the house with the For Sale sign on the ground and knocked on the door with a casserole, loaf of bread and chocolate cake in hand. It was a quick hello and casual conversation that first meeting. As I stood on their back porch surrounded by unopened boxes and unfamiliar eyes staring at me, I told my story to our new Minister, his wife and their parents, about how my husband and I came to have our 2 year old twins. As I look back on it now, I don't know why I divulged this part of my life so openly, but I was later to learn that it served a purpose for more than the people in the room that Spring day. They politely listened to me ramble on; I, the proud mother, who still couldn't believe I had been so blessed. A son and a daughter came to complete my world. Really, the only way I could introduce myself was to share my newfound identity: Mom. They said their thank yous and I said good-bye.
When Spring arrived, I took special pleasure in planning our families Mother's Day celebration. It was no longer a dreaded holiday for me and I anxiously awaited the impending fuss to be made around those of us with the title Mom, now that I, too, was a member of the club. And one sunny day he called. The Minister asked if I would be willing to say a prayer at church on Mother's Day. He and his wife did not have children, and I imagined that this was a day he did not feel qualified on which to speak. But after our recent introduction, he knew that I was well entrenched in the joys of motherhood. Without hesitation, I assured him that I would come prepared to church the following Sunday.
The words came to the pages easily; the final version amounted to four minutes of spoken text. Had I overstepped my time limit? "There is no timeframe in which to pray" said the new Minister. And so I spoke these words, that Mother's Day Sunday, as I was compelled to bare my soul in His House and give thanks for my many blessings.
I was first introduced to motherhood when I married Bob and his six-year-old daughter, Jane*. Having Jane in my life was an added bonus to finding the best guy in the world. She had her daddy's happy disposition and she gave me the opportunity to be a mom - something I had been told I might never be due to medical problems I had suffered with for many years.
As we watched Jane grow, I got to practice being a mom with her every other weekend. I enjoyed putting her hair in curlers, painting her nails and making her Halloween costume every other year. I nursed her through the chickenpox and held her in my arms when she cried from a sore knee or a sad heart. I bought her party dresses for her school concerts and helped her and her girlfriend "cook" quiche for dinner one night. Bob and I took her skiing, skating and sledding and included her in our daily routine, rarely getting a babysitter who would only cheat us out of more time with her. Over the years, I had the privilege of watching what kind of dad my husband was and would be to our children. The love he has for his daughter and the loving relationship I watched between them made me want a child that much more. Then the weekends would end and Jane would go back to her mom for another long two weeks. And we would try again.
You see, four months after I met Bob, I had one of four major surgeries that would lead us down the path of infertility treatments for the six and one half years following our marriage. The surgeries were painful, the side effects to the medications were very difficult and the emotional toll on our marriage was high. But we very much wanted to have children together. And eventually we did. But it was not giving birth to my children that made me a mom. It was the lessons I learned along the way.
During our struggle to conceive, I became virtually incapable of seeing much else beside my desire to have a baby. I lost sight of my purpose in the world, my responsibility to my relationship with my husband and those around me. I let go of everything in my life that held promise because I wanted a baby. The biggest struggles were when Bob and I disagreed on whether to pursue another painful infertility treatment - I always wanted to - he did not.
At the end of six and one half years of anguish, I decided it was time to face the fact that I was not going to have a baby. But to come to terms with ending our infertility treatments, I had to acknowledge the selfishness with which I had behaved. I realized that I could lose my husband in my pursuit to be a mom, and although I could feel the souls of my children close to mine, it was time to let go. Let go of the fear of never being a mom; let go of the pain of trying, and start forgiving myself for not being perfect. It was all over and it was now time to come to terms with the life I had left to live.
First, I had to redefine what our family was going to be. Simply, family is the people we bring into our life to love and who love us in return. Biological, step, adopted - the prefix no longer mattered. Secondly, I had to determine my value as a woman. I had to learn to see myself as a person with the ability to nurture (not just a baby who might come from my body), but the people already in my life who needed me. Mothering is an attitude not a biological event.
Finally, what was I to do with the rest of my life? It became crystal clear that life was about giving love, not getting what I wanted, no matter how noble I thought the pursuit.
Soon after I shared these revelations with my husband, he returned to me with a request - he wanted us to undergo one more invitro fertilization. I was stunned. Yet it was at this moment exactly that I knew God was showing me how sacrificing my desires and giving love from the most sincere part of ones soul, comes right back to you - as my husband had to me. So, of course, I obliged. The results of that procedure are our son, Robert Joseph, and our daughter, Lauren Ann.
Looking back on my life experience to this point, I am convinced that my children were up in heaven looking down at me all those years just waiting for me to figure out the most basic concepts of love, which had become clouded by my quest to have children. Ironically, these were the same characteristics of selflessness, patience and priority I would require in my role as a mom.
But the story is bittersweet. We baptized the children and my stepdaughter, Jane, got up and left the church and we have not seen her since. Our hearts ache for her. As much love as we feel for Lauren Ann and Robert, they do not replace her. She is a teenage victim of divorce struggling with her own feelings about her place in the lives of the people who love her. We are left feeling that all the love we have given her to this point is not enough. Again another struggle. Only this time around I understand there is a purpose to this pain. Another venue for our love...a lesson to learn.
So on this Mothers Day, my prayers are for...
The women who are trying to have a baby and may or may not reach that goal
The women, who by choice do not have children, yet enrich our world in myriad ways
The women who selflessly place their children for adoption, and
The women who adopt them
The stepmoms who have committed themselves to someone else's children heart and soul, and
The moms whose children are all grown up, but are never really done being "mom"
My prayers are for all of us who mother to learn the lessons of love along the way.
I remember that Mother's Day vividly. Having taken the opportunity to articulate one part of my own journey, I inadvertently touched other people's lives. I still recall the arms that enveloped me after service that Sunday. Many parishioners divulged to me their struggles with infertility or similar pains their friends and family members had experienced. My heart ached for their pain, and I could not help but feel bonded to these people I did not really know.
This journey I had taken to become a mom, was a road I thought I had traveled alone. As life unfolds before me and my understanding of the world comes into focus, it is clear to me now, there are no roads we walk alone; only choices that bring us closer to each other.
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Momma Kath -
I just stopped by TTC, feeling more than a bit nostalgic. When I was trying
to conceive my son, this site was an absolute godsend. The wealth of
information and the warm & welcome atmosphere on the boards helped
immeasurably. I also remember your personal email to me when I was a
clueless newbie asking a question that, no doubt, had been asked & answered
dozens of times before.
Thank you, again, for your dedication and effort.
Peggy
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Dear MommKath,
I wanted to thank you for providing 18 months of
solace. My husband and I were ttc since Aug. 99.
...And it FINALLY
happened. I'm officially preganant and due on
October 14th.
I often "lurked" around the site reading messages
and feeling better that there were other people who felt my pain.
So, thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for
making this site available.
We're all so lucky to have you!
Sincerely,
Carey